so, if something happens to me, most of the family recipes are in that big blue cookbook i made... but if you kids get a hankerin' for octopus out of season, here's how it's done... (recipe amounts and harvest dates are approximate) start by planting some tomato seeds, or better yet, go to that amish place and buy some nice flats of tomato plants. i like to get a good mix, some romas and ox hearts, anything that looks good will do. get your husband or partner to plant, mulch, water, and weed them for you. late august or early september get someone with testosterone to harvest a few five gallon buckets of tomatoes for you- now the magic can begin! run the tomatoes through your victorio tomato strainer. cook the resulting tomato sauce until it reduces by a third- usually two days worth of simmering. the whole house will have a wonderful tomato aroma! let it cool and store in the freezer bags, two cups in each bag. wait until a few weeks before x-mas. find a person with plenty of money, have them buy as much octopus as they are willing to. now you are ready to cook... you will need the dude man (DM) once again to cut up the octopus into bite sized pieces, drain the water off of it, pat it as dry as you can. get out a big spaghetti cooking/stew pot, saute the octopi in some nice hot olive oil- the water is going to cook out of the octopi, and the pan is going to fill up with all that juice- reduce it until it is almost gone and the meat is almost about to sizzle. throw in a couple of cups of chopped celery, (chopped with love). add a shitload of finely chopped garlic- twenty cloves? at least twenty, maybe more, and then get that frozen tomato sauce in there, five or six packages... and some spices ... basil and parsley and probably some more garlic. cook this for a few hours until the octopi is very tender. serve with plenty of garlic bread. be sure to take some time to enjoy the praise being heaped upon you by your family for making such a delicious dish!

what a great easter, accomplished nothing, no yakking, no mushrooms, no leg of lamb. i sure did have a good time. so, i am busy working on these albums... i have found some gems... i will try and post some of the best here, for your enjoyment...


peter in his underpants, armed and dangerous:

         

more will to come, soon.

so, while the boys are fishing, and since my disc drive is down, i thought i would mess up DM's neat little computer desk top...


with the break in the weather, i went out to clean up the tack room... i noticed this hole in the door...
       

wtf? why is there a hole in my tack room door? so, i went in, sure enough, there is a fucking hole there, as well...

    

so, i looked around the room, wtf is this?

    

a broken arrow?

    

if the arrow fits.... DM, you need to learn to hide the evidence.
next time keep the safety in the ON position, please.

massage on cabbage beach:



the table legs are inside coconut shell so the table does not sink into the sand. this was a terrific massage, if you were wondering!

so, you kids are all familiar with the $10,000.00 game? the one in which i pretend to receive $10,000.00, and fantasize about what i am going to do with it ? well, i am still playing, no "fer reals monies" yet. i now know what to do with it, if it ever happens in the future...

going to take everybody here:

     

gold rock beach, on grand bahama island, paradise.

So, we had fun in Florida. Well, I had fun in Florida while Pete suffered from some bad allergies. After an amazing time in the Ybor district in Tampa we headed south to LaBelle, FL to stay with my grandparents. We played in the shuffleboard contest, bingoed, and fished two days. The first day of fishing we went to a secret place that few Floridians know about. It was a foggy morning and a long trek into the jungle

but it was worth it

We ended up catching a lot of bass and a couple of blue gill and walked back out where I snapped a few pretty pictures of the everglades.

We rested for a day and went back out to try and score couple more fish for our fish fry. Although it was beautiful
and we made a few friends

but the fish did not want our worms and we walked off with two bass caught by my grandpa and one by Pete.

Our last day in Florida was a wash out. We visited Ave Maria, FL which your money to Domino's pizza helped build. They were finishing up their sculpture that they have been working on for over a year

and inside I drank some holy water

then we were off to Marco Island where Pete did not have such a good time on the beach and it was cold, a little rainy and overcast but I still played with seagulls and found some pretty shells. We stopped at the Manatee Lookout area where, even after I called and sang some manatee songs, the manatees did not come out to play. Maybe next year.

so, DM butchered one of the turkeys, and we have it plucked and ready to cook in the fridge- 34.5 lbs.  that is big enough that i think we can get by with only one for dinner on thursday.  even though he is a big fucker, he is very buff, no fat is to be seen....

the solution is my new secret weapon:

                         
... ta da- a meat injector. the plan is to inject the turkey with a mixture of butter and stock- homemade chicken stock from our own chickens that i cooked all day today- to make the meat extra juicy and yummy. i hope that i do not fuck it up.

only thing left to buy is the baguettes for the garlic bread and some bourbon for the topping for my pie contest pie.  oh, and the brussel sprouts. anybody else in on the pie contest besides DM and i? (i cannot promise that i won't cheat)

!!CONTEST!!- guess how many sticks of butter are in the fridge right now and win a fabulous prize!!!!!!!

          
(tried to post this yesterday, on her actual b-day but blogdrive was down, crap)
(it says blogdrive is fixed now...)
( 7 days later, i will try to post it again...)

dear dr. atkins,

you are a great guy, the big kahuna, mayor mc cheese, in my book....  but, fuckit, sometimes i am going to have a baked potato, dammit.

it is was just a small potato, and i am feeling very guilt ridden.

yours truly,
jollykay